It's Throat Punch Time!

Let’s send this crap week off with a bang and get on with enjoying the weekend shall we?!
First I’d like to throat punch Monday, just because it’s Monday.
Next, I’d like to throat punch anyone who tells me I need to get more sleep.  Well, maybe not EVERYONE just MOST of them.  The ones that tell me I need more sleep and then when I try to explain why I don’t get any sleep they proceed with telling me all the things I’m doing wrong with my kids now or EVER and how if I hadn’t done those things then THEY would sleep and then I could sleep…repeat.  You are NOT helping.  When my kids DO go to sleep, I now lay in my bed and think of all the stupid parenting “mistakes” that I made and then I stay up all night trying to convince myself I am not a loser parent who should just hand over my kids to a more capable person and commit myself to the nearest psych ward.
Then, I’d like to throat punch anyone who preaches on and on about how I need to schedule “Mom Time”.  Let me make this clear, I get MOM TIME all.the.time. What I NEED is “Woman” time, or how about “Wife” time.  Better yet, can I get some “Child of GOD” time?!  I am a mom 24/7/365.25 and I would really appreciate a few moments to be something OTHER than a Mom.  I guess I could go in to the nearest psych ward for a three day volunteer evaluation but that seems a bit drastic just to score some down time.
Last, I’d like to throat punch anyone who has ever or will ever talk smack about my wondermoose friends on the interwebs!  Ya’ll ROCK MY SOCKS and keep me sane and prevent me from throat punching people in person and the very idea that someone disrespects your awesomeness …well…it makes me angry…in that “Crocodile Hunter Angray” way.
I guess it’s no surprise that when I DID get to snooze on the couch with Lil Man my dream involved a public school turned insane asylum.  I was the uber hot cocky hero man (aka. Seely Booth) running in slow motion from overweight orderlies who were once again trying to drug me so they could steal my brain tissue.

One thought on “It's Throat Punch Time!

  1. Jenn says:

    Don’t you just love all the “helpful” advice we get from others? sigh.
    Don’t you fret-you are a FANTABULOUS mama and you will eventually sleep…one day. LOL!
    Hang in there hon, big hugs!!

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